Friday, 7 December 2012

Precious Pain




Excruciating
Ripping apart, pain unknown
Gasp for breath

Gasp for breath
Convulsions pick pace, paralyze
Helpless, I bide time

Helpless, I bide time
Pain priceless reaches crescendo
Bite lips, soak in

Bite lips, soak in
Fervent prayers sent forth, deliverance
Sweet cries

written for Haiku Heights
Picture taken from: fineartamerica.com

43 comments:

  1. Im reading this form of haiku(a set) after a long long time, and I don't think it could have been any better. Wonderful expressions. *takes a bow* Pain can be enormous, but all it takes to express is the subtle gestures which you captured in these line, that's the beauty of it. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Sankara, that so generous of you. I am glad you liked it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. This pain was indeed precious ... such a lovely haiku illustrating the joy of life that comes with sweet cries ... amazing !!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your ever encouraging comments:)

      Delete
  4. Pain worth bearing. Great words.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I am sure many would say they would not mind having this pain .. it is so special

    Bikram's

    ReplyDelete
  6. Surely they would say, that's why women are special;)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Those sweet cries make it all worthwhile!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Whoever said women are the weaker ones sure needs to rethink. Of-course the joy of motherhood overshadows all the pain...

    ReplyDelete
  9. The pain of motherhood is forgotten when she sees the baby ~

    ReplyDelete
  10. Pain that is mysterious can be most testing. But when it is childbirth no pain can match the joy. Nice cascades Meena!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. agree Hank, this is a totally unknown pain, but the result is worth enduring!

      Delete
  11. a sweet story told there brilliantly.. made me remember my childhood days.. injections used to freak me out.. they still do.. ironically, i am a doctor!

    i loved the way you concluded the story.. deliverance.. sweet cries..

    fantastic... as always..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So, nice to know that you are a doctor. and glad that you liked it!

      Thanks a ton!

      Delete
  12. I think those sweet cries are what make the pain worthwhile for any mother.. A lovely poem.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Vinay, I hope it met the syllable restriction!

      Delete
  13. Thanks Pranita, I read yours, its awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Ahh!! those cries are sweet!
    Beautiful writing Meenakshi :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Super ! Perfect description of a mother's experience during childbirth !

    ReplyDelete
  16. superb. what a description!must say can't be better.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Here's my request. You'l see it on other sites I've selected -

    I'm affiliated with a new National Pain organization that is not up on the web yet. (I'm not paid!)
    With permission I would like to send them your Pain Haiku as they are interested in using creative expressions in promos and/or the site itself. However, I need written permission.
    If you give permission send me an e-mail at judithwesterfield@gmail.com with a cut-n-paste of the haiku you are giving permission for and whether if you want your name attached or want to remain anonymous.

    Judith


    ReplyDelete
  18. Ah... sweet cries! I think of the baby after the pain. I won't say how painful childbirth was for me. I had anti-pain shot. Your haiku though paints a wonderful picture of what moms can endure for love.

    ReplyDelete
  19. So amazingly captured...
    And the sweet cries of the baby will be replaced by cries of pain..
    But this time tears of mother whose children abandon them in oldage
    http://locomente.blogspot.in/2012/12/pain.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Satya, Ya that's the other end of spectrum, and that pain is difficult to endure!

      Delete
  20. very few could have described it better than you!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for this wonderful compliment!

      Delete
  21. Indeed its the precious pain...its was captivating..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for visiting and reading!

      Delete
  22. Ow, what a vivid, beautiful description of the birthing porcess. Very well crafted. Thanks for the visit.

    ReplyDelete
  23. This is exquisite. I have never given birth, but I could feel it.

    ReplyDelete